Yeah, I’m not going to sugarcoat it – the dreaded padding out of the story to make it 12 issues long has begun. Still, dear reader, I feel obligated to warn you of what to expect as we dive into this belfry of bat-themed bloodsuckers, so let me try to let you know what you are in for if you pick this up…and hopefully do so in a manner more succinct than the comic I read.
Hey, Who Switched My Comic With Action Comics #593? (IFYKYK)
If you were to tell me that DC vs Vampires: World War V was to have a graphic sex scene between a vampiric Scott Free and a really kinky Big Barda, well, I would scratch my head for a bit before going, “Sure, why not?” And for those of you thinking I’m being a big ‘ol prude, well, why don’t you judge for yourselves?
Spoiler
But, the result of this night of passion is a miracle child (…ok, that’s actually clever. I’m a sucker for a good pun) who is now the driving force of the plot. As a child conceived of vampire and man (yes, you need to ignore that Barda is technically a New God), it will mend the relations between humankind and vampiredom…or damn everyone. So, now we have a child savior subplot, which necessitates the appearance of everyone’s favorite character!!!
He’s a vampire that makes ghosts. REJOICE!!!Speaking of precocious vampire babies, it seems like Damian is about to get the spanking he deserves for stirring trouble between the heroes and the vampires, with a vampire Raven, a vampire Cassandra Sandsmark (hey, didn’t she die in DC vs Vampires when Signal blew himself up?), and a vampire Black Adam (ok, he definitely died when Starfire hit him with a bolt of sunlight to the face) about to take him in. But as always, there are Batfamily members ready to clean up after him, including the new Batman, who is someone who trained Damian, so it ain’t Jace. Pity, does anybody remember him? No, just me? Oh well.
Meanwhile, the heroes are attacking vampire strongholds, Queen Barbara’s court continues to bicker (I really didn’t expect vampire Grodd to be Barbara’s biggest backer, but his loyalty is another aspect that gives this book some charm and gives the vampires much-needed personality), Constantine is trying to remember, and vampire Wonder Woman fights Alfred. I touched only briefly on all the subplots in the story right now, but hey, so does the comic.
Score: 5/10
Backup: A Hero For These Trying Times
Were you expecting Bat-mite to develop a sense of adoration for Geo-Force after seeing him in action saving lives? Maybe realize that DC characters other than Batman can be awesome in their own way? HA-HA-HA-HA, of course not. It’s just a series of jokes where a bunch of C-list and D-listers die in horrible fashions off-screen, by what is implied to be the result of Bat-Mite’s fault. I hope you found this funny and maybe get something out of it because I sure didn’t.
Can you name everyone Bat-Mite is following? If so, your prize is a twinge of sadness.
Score: 4/10
Recommended If
- You wanted to see Bat-Mite’s wacky antics in the world of DC vs Vampires.
- Vampire Grodd is your favorite character.
- You like a good pun. Well, it’s a pun.
Overall
Sigh…I was worried about the incoming padding of the material in World War V, and unfortunately, I was not proven wrong. So, now all we have to do is watch the series spin its proverbial wheels until it decides to untangle its threads. As for when that will happen, your guess is as good as mine.
Score: 4.5/10
English (US) · 